My Elderly Parents: In Home Care

If we ask our elderly parents about their preferences for living arrangements, it comes as no surprise that many would like to remain in their own homes. Actually a high percentage of the elderly population does live in their own homes until it is no longer an alternative.

If this is the case with your parents, then you may be faced with how to go about making this a viable option especially if there are no family members with the time, distance or resources to act as caregiver. Bringing in outside help is frequently not a choice that many elderly are agreeable to, in spite of the obvious need. They often say help is not needed and they are very capable of managing on their own.

It may be they think any outside assistance is a threat to their independence or an invasion of their privacy. When your parents are both living in their own home together, direct your attention to the parent who is less in need. For example, if your Father needs the most assistance and the burden falls often on your Mother approach him by suggesting it would certainly be helpful to Mother if she had some assistance with cleaning, cooking, etc thereby freeing her to be available for him.

Hiring somebody to help with household chores is not going to invade their privacy and may be less threatening to their independence than if you started right out hiring somebody to help with personal care. If you place the emphasis on getting help with housework or suggest help with grocery shopping, driving to doctor appointments and other errands if driving is no longer an option, they may be more receptive. Your hope is that they will see the value in having assistance and develop a trusting relationship with their caregiver. If they can develop that trust then down the road they are more likely to accept assistance with their personal care when it is needed.

Another approach when your parents are living alone and you are responsible for overseeing their living situation is to focus the attention on you needing the help and not them. My parents will practically bend over backwards to make life easier for any of us kids but wont consider the help for themselves. Suggest that bringing in a housekeeper would ease your worry about managing daily cleaning, shopping, meals, and laundry. After being taken by ambulance to the hospital with chest pains, etc my Mother is more aware of her vulnerability and her need for some type of home care. As the closest adult child I can totally relate to sharing the burden. If my parents had somebody just for a couple of hours a day it would ease my mind and heart tremendously.

Take stock of what your parents needs are and how best to meet those needs while allowing them as much independence as possible. One of the most difficult times of our lives as adult children will be helping our parents as they experience the decline of social interaction, health and independence. Convincing them to accept outside help and successfully implementing that help will go a long way toward continuing the loving relationship of parent and adult child.

Joanne Robbins has published several articles on a variety of topics. Dealing with our parents as adult children is an extremely important topic and you can find more My Elderly Parent information at http://boomer-gear.com

Caring for Elderly Parents - Informal Caregivers Are the Backbone of the Elder Care System
Caring for aging parents can take many forms. For some grown children, that care may be as simple as mowing a lawn a couple of times a month. Others m...

Senior Home Care Services: Weighing The Decision
There are problems that can occur among the elderly, many of which are often overwhelming to family and other loved ones. That is why good home and h...

Tips For Communicating With Elderly Parents
One of the hardest things for any son or daughter is to watch his/her parents grow old. Even if the parents do not suffer from sickness like Alzheimer...

A Medical Alert System Is A Lifeline For The Elderly Generation
One of the most well-known medical alert systems available today is "Lifeline." If you have elderly parents and are the sole caregiver, regardless of...

Finding Innovative Senior Care in Your Community
While most cities in North America afford some type of care for the elderly, not all will provide the senior care that many families would like to pro...

How To Find Resources In The Community For Your Aging Parent
When you're the person responsible for providing care for your aging parents, life can become quite hectic. This situation is particularly stressful f...

Live In Care: An Economical Home Care Alternative
Home care assistance can be expensive especially when care is needed in 12, 16 or 24 hour shifts. Live-in care is provided to clients who need around ...

Tips For Helping Elderly Parents Cope With Loneliness
Statistics clearly point out the leaning towards an aging population and coping with elder care and loneliness will become a concern for many of us at...

In Home Senior Care Of Elderly Relative Solves Problem For Many
Imagine the plight of the busy career person struggling for success in the business world, while trying to effectively balance the responsibility of s...

Aunt Louise
It never ceases to prove out the frailty of some elders!! Start listening to your parents, co-workers, neighbors, or friends any time they relate a s...

How to Effectively Plan for Your Aging Parents
No, Ive been the one sacrificing my life to accommodate her, complains Gwen. Well, Ive sent plenty of money. Sis, youre the one who lives with her, sc...

Is Your Elderly Parent Visiting the Dentist?
Did you know that elderly adults are at greater risk for oral cancer than younger people? In fact, research states that those over 65 have more tooth ...

Elder Care - The Challenge of Caring for Aging Parents
We are all so accustomed to our parents caring for us that it is so very hard when the roles reverse. We see our parents as young, strong, and invinci...

The Best Home Care Provider - Who Can You Trust
As people grow old, their siblings main concern is to provide them with home care assistance in their Golden years. It is better safe than sorry. The ...

Caregiver Discussions With Doctors And Health Care Professionals
When you are caring for a parent it is important to keep in regular contact with the medical community. Talking regularly with doctors, nurses, pharma...