How to be a Networking Servant

Great networkers know that they should never attend an event without first declaring what goals they want to achieve as a result of attending the event. In The Worlds Best Known Marketing Secret, Ivan Misner, Ph.D. supplies The 10 Commandments of Working a Mixer. The second commandment is to have a goal for the number of people youd like to meet. Super networkers take it a step further by determining in advance the types of people theyd like to meet. For example one goal might be to meet two new people within your specific target market. A Networking Super Hero, a term coined by Scott Ginsberg, author of The Power of Approachability, does not necessarily focus on who they will meet, but who they will help.

Servant leadership is a term that had been connected to religious communities for many years. Those who exhibit a servant attitude think of others first. They follow the Golden Rule of, Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you. In the world of business language, the world mirroring describes the behavior of a person repeating an action or question back to the person who asked the exact question just minutes before. Using the same principle, helping others to be more successful, is noble and lucrative, because again that same behavior is generally returned. The Golden Rule and mirroring have very similar definitions. The only distinction is the use of different words. Perhaps a new term is needed to better describe the Networking Super Heros actions. Could this term be networking servant?

This business servant attitude focuses leaders on developing those around them. It leads to people working together in a collaborative, lets solve this problem together, environment. Recently, a business owner attended a Chamber of Commerce networking event. For many, this type of marketing is just a step above wishing on a star. But this young entrepreneur made it work because of his helping attitude. He noticed many people conversing with only one other person. He said, More likely, they're comfortable chatting with the one person they've found, and don't feel like stepping out of their comfort zone for the five or ten other people in the room with whom they might also be able to create a great relationship. I know I've been guilty of that in the past. At this event, he decided to follow Commandment #3 from Dr. Misner, act like a host not a guest. Instead of getting into conversations, he intentionally looked around for those who were standing alone (quite often the newer folks). He also changed his approach from How can I work with them? to How can I help them? Such a slight adjustment and such a huge difference.

He noticed the dynamic change immediately. He exclaimed, Wow! What a difference! I met a gentleman who provided sales training and put him in touch with another who did marketing training. The last I saw of them, they were exchanging cards and planning to meet about possible joint ventures. I met a first-time visitor who was complaining that his website wasn't getting as much traffic as it used to. Now, I could have tried to sell him on my own business. It's not a perfect fit, but I might have been able to help. Instead, I put him in touch with a new member whom I'd met, who specialized in enhancing existing sites to increase the number of return visitors. Now I've got the start of a good relationship with both of them. Finally, just before the emcee closed the time for us to meet each other, I ran into a visitor who was standing alone and looking a bit lost. After introducing myself, I found that she was a representative of a local marketing firm who was in need of a good website developer. We've since met for lunch and she will be sending me the details of a project she would like to work on with me.

He added, By changing my focus and stepping out of my comfort zone, I was able to help several other people and, just as important, make that final contact for myself. I'm still going to review my Ten Commandments of Networking a Mixer before each event I plan to attend, but from now on, my Commandment #2 will change from how many people I want to meet, to how many people I want to help.

Networking, especially at large events has earned a bad reputation in the past. Without the servant attitude, people viciously shove their business cards at anyone within arms reach. They talk about nothing but me, me, me and wonder why when they return to their office that they have nothing to show for the time theyve spent. Additionally, these bores are always having to meet new, unsuspecting networking prospects, because the ones who have had the pleasure of getting within three feet of them before, now run for cover or turn the other way. There is nothing worse than commission breath at a networking even and even worse there is no special bottle of mouthwash to take away the offensive smell. We can all help networking reclaim its sullied reputation by thinking of solving others challenges first. Think of the way the world would work if that was the one rule everyone used no matter what. The vision of a Networking Super Hero may sound more glamorous than a Networking Servant, but the question is, are we looking for glitz or are we looking to lend a hand?

Debby Peters is the owner and Director of Training of The Certified Networker Program of Ohio, Ltd., (http://www.cnpofohio.com) a 24 hour referral based training that is evolving a community of profitable referral partners. She is also posts to the blog http://www.cnpofohio.blogspot.com

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